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After a total news drought lasting more than 8 days, we are pleased to report that Cheshire has been found alive and, well, not really well, but certainly kicking.

It's been all go in Widnes the last few days: first, gunshots were fired at someone's house. Then, a woman was assaulted while asleep.

Elsewhere, Wilmslow (which has been a hotbed of crime since Kerry Katona's burglary) made the headlines again. This time, because a care worker brutalised a patient.

Lastly, someone shot a cat with an airgun in the Chester suburb of Blacon.

Nothing nice to report, but we are relieved that Aunty has temporarily remembered that life does go on in Cheshire...